North Korea, a country that makes China seem like a thriving democracy, may not strike you as a culinary epicenter. However, there are a handful of North Korean restaurants in Beijing – mostly sponsored and staffed by the North Korean embassy. And they seem to be quite popular establishments – for both the cuisine and the entertainment.

 

 

A colleague of mine and I were invited to dine this evening with a local businessman at one of these restaurants, which is called Pyongyang Headanghwa. While I wasn’t excited about contributing to the coffers of Kim Jong Il, which is basically what you are doing when dining at one of these restaurants, it sounded like such a fascinating experience that I couldn’t pass it up. Not to mention that the businessman we were dining with apparently owns a gold camel worth $1 million that he is always trying to sell anyone who will listen, which sounded entertaining enough to me.

 

And of course I was in search of a new bacon experience.

 

In summary, dining at Pyongyang Headanghwa was one of those “how the fuck did I end up here” moments in life. There was definitely more than one disturbing aspect to the experience. So this is probably the most therapeutic blog entry I’ll ever do.

 

As their brochure states, “warmly welcome to Haedanghwa No. 3 Branch Restaurant overheating with friendship and fraternity.” The food is also genuinely North Korean, because the brochure also boasts of “establishment of direct transportation system from DPR Korea to Beijing Capital Airport in order to serve non-polluted dainties of all lands and seas.” I’m not going to question it!

 

The restaurant is staffed with young native North Korean women who are apparently shipped over from Pyongyang and kept under close watch (particularly after some recent attempts by North Koreans to defect in Beijing). They were all genuinely friendly – sadly, I imagine their guarded life in Beijing is a step up from life in Pyongyang. But they were definitely well trained – to the point of standing alert and smiling when you mention Dear Leader.

 

 

The servers also put on a performance at the end of the meal. We had two women sing to us (with assistance from the karaoke machine in our private dining room), and then two others put on an accordion and violin performance. They actually were quite talented, although the loud volume and reverb from the mic did make the performance a bit overwhelming. At the end of the performance, we were given plastic flower bouquets to present the performers as a thank you. At which point my colleague leaned over and whispered, “I will pay you 10 dollars if you get one of them to defect,” which was the first of many tasteless jokes throughout the night…

 

Throughout the meal, a propaganda-style video was playing on the karaoke screen in our dining room with all sorts of happy and beautiful images of how grand and prosperous life is in the DPRK. And I’m pretty sure the dining room was wired to the gills to record every moment of our North Korean dining experience.

 

 

We had several dishes – I have no idea how many – and it would be impossible for me to recall them all. All I know is that we specifically requested that dog not be served. But there were a few particular dishes worth pointing out. First was the lobster sashimi, which was served on a plate with the lobster from which the sashimi came…and the lobster was still moving. That was disturbing at first, but not as disturbing as the fish sashimi served on top of the fish that was struggling in its last moments of life. And to top it off, the head from the recently expired fish appeared in my soup later on in the meal. I’m still a bit traumatized from the event.

 

 

Naturally, with this being a Korean meal, there was kimchi – something I am not capable of appreciating or enjoying no matter how hard I try. We also had a liquor made from ginseng which was totally nasty, but of course we had to imbibe for the many toasts that were given throughout the meal in typical Chinese style.

 

 

But the course that makes this whole experience bacon blog worthy was, of course, the bacon. This Korean dish is called sam gyup sal which is barbecued bacon served with a sesame dipping sauce. By the point in the meal when the bacon was served, I was stuffed from the many dishes I had already eaten. So I only sampled a few bites of the sam gyup sal. It was only moderately satisfying and not something I’d go out of my way to find next time I’m in Seoul (or Pyongyang). But at least I can say I’ve tried it.

 

Despite the ginseng liquor, this was a rather sobering experience and one that I won’t soon forget. So if you want a taste of the DPRK without stepping foot in the country, dining at Pyongyang Headanghwa will definitely give you a taste!